And I find it kinda funny
I find it kinda sad
The dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had
|
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But I'm no longer in a band.
Apparently, the lead guitarist had reshuffled the band lineup, removing my brother, Weixin and myself from the list, instead, bringing on Christopher Ong and Joe from One Year Gap. So fine. I had been removed. What pissed me off is why I knew nothing about it, until my brother heard it from someone, who heard it from a friend of his, who heard from my (ex) drummer, who of course, knew what was going on.
I asked Jireh about it, and he told me he reshuffled, sorry sorry etc, and that my brother and I were great and everything. Of course I just said nevermind, shit happens and stuff like that. Inside, I was screaming. I mean, couldn't he have the basic courtesy to just TELL ME about it?!
I'm very, VERY upset.
Imperfections had become a part of me in some way, playing together all the time, all gathering at the Wong's or Leng Ann for practices and jamming. They had become like family to me, and getting removed isn't doing me a lot of good. It just reminds me that I have one more reason for my work ruining my life. Besides, I feel... useless. As though I was used for a while and replaced. Like a sanitary napkin or something.
Some people also don't know how much each performance actually means to me either. I really appreciate those who actually DID come down to catch me play instead of just coming in after the performance, or leaving before I played (you know who you are). Even THOSE I appreciate, for just being there. Now that I don't have a band, it just makes me feel even worse. Now that I have no one to play with...
Whatever.
Forget it.
If you've never seen/heard me play... well.. too bad.
It's not that I don't want to move on in the music scene. I'll never feel as comfortable with another group as I did with these guys anymore, this I know. Don't tell me "You wouldn't know because you haven't tried" or bullshit like that. For one, I've tried playing other bands, and it didn't work out at all, nor did I feel as comfortable as I did with Imperfections. So I won't be playing in a band anymore. Unless Imperfections wants me back.
I'd gladly pick up the keys, the axe and the microphone again.
. // prawninator | 01:34 + ~ |
You might be living in my neighbourhood, or some other town or country far away. I don't know. And neither do you, at this point.
Wherever you are, I know I'll find you... if you don't find me first.
It's just a matter of time.
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