B

B

Zhou Pei Lin





And I find it kinda funny

I find it kinda sad

The dreams in which I'm dying

Are the best I've ever had





B
Yin Yang

. // bloglinks +
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Monday, June 20, 2005

Attended a gig over at The Third Place this evening.

So many familiar faces, so many people I've known then, and gotten to know after my life in school. It's funny, really, as they started to mingle around, my old friends shaking hands with my relatively new friends, and talking like they've known each other forever.

Just strange.

It's 4am and I've just finished packing. I just realised how HEAVY all my stuff is. I think I need to lighten my load. It's impossible for my carry-on, as my laptop (or rather, my dad's, as it can support WoW and NwN) has to be in it, along with a book and my DS, amongst other things.

Spent three hours discussing with Chris over the phone on what to bring. You know what, speaking of packing, I just remembered what I forgot to pack. A TOWEL. No worries, that can be added in later.

I'm just so nervous.

Really, nervous.

So help me God, I will cry on the plane and kick a fuss as to why my ears are popping for no apparent reason, and then complain when my DS hangs (which it did, this evening). So much so that the person occupying the seat next to mine will have no choice but to shift him or herself to another seat. In which case I'll just yell.

No, I'm kidding.

Speaking with Vayne earlier, I said I was nervous, because I don't know if Ryan would return the feelings I have for him. Vayne just asked if he likes me at all. Of course, I replied yes, but his response was just pretty simple. "He would have no reason not to like you if you were truthful to him about yourself." I thought to myself for a second, and nodded, knowing that I wouldn't have lied to Ryan. And if I had, it'd be forcefully pried from me anyhow, so either way, I can't lie to him.

Recalling a conversation I had with Ryan about two weeks ago, he asked if I was afraid of him. I replied with both a yes, and a no.

Yes = I'm afraid to be hurt (by him)
No = I just want to be loved (by him)

I know, I know. Corny. But seriously, this trip to the USA is taking all my guts and willpower to pull off, and where is he now? In Texas. Not that I can blame him; he's planned that trip for ages, too, so much so I had to fit my schedule around his.

I can't help but feel anger and resentment, though.

Ah well... I'm done packing.
All I need now is my camera, and my laptop battery.

. // prawninator | 04:04 + ~

|
To whoever you are, wherever you are, I love you. I probably don't know you yet, but when I do, I'll know, and so will you. And you'll love me for who I am, as will I.

You might be living in my neighbourhood, or some other town or country far away. I don't know. And neither do you, at this point.

Wherever you are, I know I'll find you... if you don't find me first.

It's just a matter of time.

. // links | misc +
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