B

B

Zhou Pei Lin





And I find it kinda funny

I find it kinda sad

The dreams in which I'm dying

Are the best I've ever had





B
Yin Yang

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Sunday, June 12, 2005

This is getting ridiculously weird.

I dreamt about Kevin last night again. I've been dreaming about him a lot lately, and I don't know why. After all, he refuses to return my messages, and refuses to even acknowledge me anymore. We've lost contact for over four years now, and only recently did I start dreaming about him.

It wasn't any weird or fucked up dream, more like an every-day one where you go out, talk and then wake up kinda thing. That's what we did; went out, and talked. I remember asking why we lost contact, and all he said was "personal problems". I remember just letting it go then.

I miss my cousin.

No doubt he wasn't always there, but I grew up with him. He was five when I was one, and I remember a picture of him and I at the zoo then, with my parents and my grandmother. We were so happy and innocent then. Then we went to school, got into the prestigious Victoria School while I was stuck in Fairfield. He went on to Junior College while I just started secondary school, and it pretty much broke down there.

I guess age difference made him realise that we were different in maturity. But that's been around 10 years now, we're both adults already. He's 25, and I'm 21. I just want to see him again, know what I mean? To just talk about how much we've changed, what we've been doing. We are, after all, family.

I really miss my cousin.

. // prawninator | 12:20 + ~

|
To whoever you are, wherever you are, I love you. I probably don't know you yet, but when I do, I'll know, and so will you. And you'll love me for who I am, as will I.

You might be living in my neighbourhood, or some other town or country far away. I don't know. And neither do you, at this point.

Wherever you are, I know I'll find you... if you don't find me first.

It's just a matter of time.

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