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And I find it kinda funny I find it kinda sad The dreams in which I'm dying Are the best I've ever had |
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. // bloglinks + airina artieee bjössi brandon caterina chillicrapblog chris (one-year-gap) cordelia dhalif donald ember ewan ewen fadil frances giggs guthrie huiwen ian ivy jane jay kenny labbit leck koon leonard linus marcus maria melissa melvin michelle morganth nat ho nat yong pamela potatobiscuit pris meimei rudi sade samantha sidney siew ling silver sharon stacy terentius travis tom wenting zhen ru . // archives + 02/01/2002 - 03/01/2002 03/01/2002 - 04/01/2002 04/01/2002 - 05/01/2002 05/01/2002 - 06/01/2002 06/01/2002 - 07/01/2002 07/01/2002 - 08/01/2002 08/01/2002 - 09/01/2002 10/01/2002 - 11/01/2002 11/01/2002 - 12/01/2002 12/01/2002 - 01/01/2003 02/01/2003 - 03/01/2003 03/01/2003 - 04/01/2003 04/01/2003 - 05/01/2003 05/01/2003 - 06/01/2003 06/01/2003 - 07/01/2003 07/01/2003 - 08/01/2003 08/01/2003 - 09/01/2003 09/01/2003 - 10/01/2003 10/01/2003 - 11/01/2003 11/01/2003 - 12/01/2003 12/01/2003 - 01/01/2004 01/01/2004 - 02/01/2004 02/01/2004 - 03/01/2004 03/01/2004 - 04/01/2004 04/01/2004 - 05/01/2004 05/01/2004 - 06/01/2004 06/01/2004 - 07/01/2004 07/01/2004 - 08/01/2004 08/01/2004 - 09/01/2004 09/01/2004 - 10/01/2004 10/01/2004 - 11/01/2004 11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004 12/01/2004 - 01/01/2005 01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005 02/01/2005 - 03/01/2005 04/01/2005 - 05/01/2005 05/01/2005 - 06/01/2005 06/01/2005 - 07/01/2005 07/01/2005 - 08/01/2005 08/01/2005 - 09/01/2005 09/01/2005 - 10/01/2005 10/01/2005 - 11/01/2005 11/01/2005 - 12/01/2005 12/01/2005 - 01/01/2006 01/01/2006 - 02/01/2006 02/01/2006 - 03/01/2006 03/01/2006 - 04/01/2006 04/01/2006 - 05/01/2006 05/01/2006 - 06/01/2006 06/01/2006 - 07/01/2006 07/01/2006 - 08/01/2006 08/01/2006 - 09/01/2006 09/01/2006 - 10/01/2006 10/01/2006 - 11/01/2006 11/01/2006 - 12/01/2006 12/01/2006 - 01/01/2007 01/01/2007 - 02/01/2007 02/01/2007 - 03/01/2007 03/01/2007 - 04/01/2007 04/01/2007 - 05/01/2007 05/01/2007 - 06/01/2007 06/01/2007 - 07/01/2007 07/01/2007 - 08/01/2007 08/01/2007 - 09/01/2007 09/01/2007 - 10/01/2007 10/01/2007 - 11/01/2007 11/01/2007 - 12/01/2007 12/01/2007 - 01/01/2008 01/01/2008 - 02/01/2008 02/01/2008 - 03/01/2008 03/01/2008 - 04/01/2008 04/01/2008 - 05/01/2008 05/01/2008 - 06/01/2008 08/01/2008 - 09/01/2008 09/01/2008 - 10/01/2008 |
I was hurt last night when Ryan told me to back off from his personal life. I guess it seems I'm no better than any one of his common friends now, and somehow, it hurts. Jealousy over her just creeps up my neck, into my head, numbing it and stabbing my heart. Why do I still feel so jealous? I shouldn't be, right? I have Chris. Truth is, he doesn't even suspect that I'm losing interest in him. Is my acting THAT good? I don't know how long I can stay with him and not feel guilty about deceiving him, like how I felt guilty for hiding him from Ryan. I'm in a dilemma. Do I give Chris up and return to Ryan? Do I forget about Ryan and continue on with Chris? I love both men, though not really one more than the other. Maybe differently, but not more. But which one do I love romantically? I know I'm comfortable with Chris, but I'll only know if I'm comfortable with Ryan when I meet him. I just need him to wait a few more weeks until I get there, until my feet touches the same ground he walks on, until my hands can finally feel him, my eyes finally meet his. I'm getting goosebumps just thinking about it. *sigh* . // prawninator | 10:48 + ~ I swear. Some people think they have an excuse to be arrogant. Okay, I have a promotion from a distributor, that allows the shopper to buy one game, and purchase another game from a certain selection for 50% off. But in order for the promotion to be valid, he has to fill up a small form with his name, email address and contact number. That's ALL. So this man with a smug face walks into the shop with his son, and promptly started complaining about another similar offer by EA. My colleague explains to him the situation with that, and the result was a very disgruntled middle-aged man. His son looks around for games. After FIFTEEN minutes of listening to his whining, he finally stops and comes to the counter with Brothers In Arms. Naturally, as a salesperson, I ask him if he was interested in the promotion. Of course, as a stingy old man, he said yes and sent his son out scouting for another game. So his son brought another game to the counter. I asked his father to fill up the little paper slip, but the man refused. "WHAT?! I'm not giving anyone any of my details!!" "But sir, in order for the promotion to be valid, you have to." "FINE! I won't buy it then!" And he storms out of the shop, pulling his son away. I soooooo wanted to tell him that it would be the same case EVERYWHERE ELSE. I don't do business with such people. We don't need it anyway. One less asshole to deal with. . // prawninator | 21:10 + ~ So Ryan decided to create a blog where he could record his thoughts. Cute. I helped him design the layout (well sue me for being unoriginal, but other than color and pictures, it's the same as mine) until about six in the morning. I always say that the "puppy-eyes" look don't work on me. I just found out that when it comes to Ryan, it does. I'm too much of a softy, aren't I? Heh. His first entry really struck me. No, not as shock or anything. It felt more like a brick in the head. Either that or my head just fell on my desk. Hard. I mean, I know he feels for me. I just didn't know as to which extent that he did. Now I know, I guess, and again, my emotions are tearing me up. While reading his entry, I cried. He mentioned something about him thinking about me everyday. Well... I have a confession. I think about him every day too. And it's not even subconscious most of the time. Sometimes I just wonder what he's doing, or where he is. Or what he's doing in World of Warcraft. I just... think, you know? Like now. I'm at work, and I'm thinking about him, so I'm writing about him in my blog when there's no customers around. Half of me wants to just SMS him, but I know he's asleep and I don't want to wake him (should his mobile be left on). The other half of me says that I should be concentrating on work, hehe. Why is he always on my mind? I still love him. I always had, and though it might have died down or just slowed a little, it was never totally gone. And it will never, either. He's been my best friend, my confidante, everything. I trust him with my life, and I'd gladly lay down mine for him. That's how close we are, and I don't want to lose that. Maybe I'm just confused. But is my confusion an excuse? . // prawninator | 18:14 + ~ Wait. Just for a month. Until I get there. Please, just wait for me. We'll sort everything out. There are some things that I'd rather settle in person than over the Internet, and this is one of them, so please. Wait. . // prawninator | 03:00 + ~ The icosahedron is truly a beatiful thing. Failures are determined with it, hits are determined with it. And the ever-elusive Natural Twenty still doesn't want to show its hand to me when I need it the most, even after all these years. It's multi-faceted surface captures the imagination of gamers all around the world, as they conquer dungeons and defeat dragons, armed with nothing but a sixpack of Mountain Dew, a sheet of paper, a pencil, and a well-used icosahedron. The icosahedron is not like any other polyhedron. Every single one of the twenty flat surfaces is a perfect equilateral triangle, and every single one of the twelve vertex is formed by joining five triangle faces together, forming a pentagram at each vertex. That's thirty edges all interconnected in some way or another to form the object. Amazing, isn't it? Such a small object being thrown around literally can bring the end of a party member, or the end of the dracolich they face. I begin to remember how many times I've failed trying to defeat a foe, only to roll a nineteen, failing the natural, and ultimately bringing doom upon my group. I once read somewhere that an equilateral triangle facing right-side up is the symbol of man, and an upside-down triangle a symbol of woman; the pentagram, the symbol of the Devil some might say, where others say it is of the Sacred Feminine. So many ideas, so many things packed all into one little piece of synthetic material. Well. To the Nine Hells of The Abyss if Ryan might have an obsession with Eldritch gems. I have an obession with my own babies, my icosahedra. They're mine. If you want, help yourself to my tetrahedra, my hexahedra, my decahedra, octahedra and dodecahedra. Those, I don't care. Just keep your hands off my precious icosahedra. . // prawninator | 12:41 + ~ I would like to talk about fruit-flavoured teas. These would be teas that are flavoured like fruit. Fruit-flavoured teas. You need to understand that. These are not fruits. They're TEAS. But they taste like fruit. All right? They have names like strawberry kiwi, lemon berry, orange mango, wild cherry, blackberry and cranberry. They taste like fruit. And they sound like fruits, too, don't they? They're not. They're teas. Fruit-flavoured teas. And frankly, I don't understand this. Personally, I've always been of a mind that if you're looking for fruit-flavour, if you're genuinely interested in something that tastes like fruit, and you find yourself in the tea section, you're obviously in the wrong aisle. My advice is, if it's fruit flavour you're after, play it safe, go ahead and get some fruit. I have found in my experience that fruit alsmot always turns out to be a reliable source of fruit flavour. Another good place you may wish to look for fruit flavour woiuld be in fruit juice. Fruit juice is made by squeezing the juice out of the fruit. Apparently, the juice that runs out of the fruit has a fruit flavour. Perhaps that's why they call it fruit juice. It doesn't taste like tea. For tea taste, you would need to get some tea. So let's sum this up: If it's fruit flavour you want, you can't go wrong with fruit. Or, as I've pointed out, fruit juice. Don't be ordering tea. Tea has a distinct tea flavour. It's not like fruit, it's more like tea. If you want tea, I say order tea. That's a different experience. It's known as "having tea." Have you noticed, by the way, there are no tea-flavoured fruits? Take a hint from nature. Thank you, George Carlin. . // prawninator | 20:16 + ~ Why do I still love him? . // prawninator | 20:21 + ~ I'd rant, but I'm too tired. So I ended up doing funny quiz thingies online while at work. Speaking of work, I WANT TO TRY SWAT 4!!
OMGWTFBBQLOL. . // prawninator | 21:51 + ~ You'd think building management is there to make life better for the tenants and their patrons. But nooooo. They seem to be biting at your toes, demanding this and that, and aboveall, higher rent. I mean, what the fuck. Okay so maybe it might seem a little trivial, but it really got on my nerves. You see, every night we collect quite a bit of rubbish from patrons and of course, ourselves, be they cups, drink cans or even game boxes at times. But they never exceed the normal wastepaper basket size. At all. This morning I received a call and several visits from the management, saying they found two garbage bags the size of the amount of rubbish my shop can collect in a WEEK (per bag) and accusing us of leaving it next to Sembawang Music. I mean, the hell. We're only a small shop. How can we even AMASS such a large amount of garbage, let alone TWO?! They told us that the cleaners are only there to clear the rubbish left behind by the patrons, and not the tenants. So why is it that I can't dispose of my rubbish normally? Aren't the people that make up my garbage the patrons themselves?! Okay, nevermind that. If they tell us once about the situation, I wouldn't mind. You know what they did though? They left the bags outside the door this morning, then called to tell us, then paid a visit, then called AGAIN, and then brought me to the "scene of the crime". All in three hours. What a fucking waste of my fucking time. GRNAARGH!! Never, EVER irritate a woman with PMS. . // prawninator | 16:28 + ~ |
To whoever you are, wherever you are, I love you. I probably don't know you yet, but when I do, I'll know, and so will you. And you'll love me for who I am, as will I. You might be living in my neighbourhood, or some other town or country far away. I don't know. And neither do you, at this point. Wherever you are, I know I'll find you... if you don't find me first. It's just a matter of time. . // links | misc + - poorgamergirl auction - email me - [shop] wear your dice - [shop] the poor gamer girl - idm website - idm forums - halloween photos The Poor Gamer Girl Fund :D We could use any help we can get, but you are not obliged to. :) | |||||||||||